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We all get by with a little help from our friends … March 11, 2013

Filed under: Life's lessons — Simply Me @ 00:11
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 We all get by with a little help from our friendsSource: Google+

Generosity is giving more than you can, and pride is taking less than you need.“― Kahlil Gibran

 

I have often heard it said that pride comes before the fall, and I must say that from my own personal experience, this statement is certainly true. One of the things I dislike most in life is having to reach out and ask for help. Even when I have needed it most, and I have incurred more heartache or hardships from not reaching out … still I refused to ask. How many times have you asked for help, and then felt ashamed for having to ask in the first place? Or worse, felt obligated because it is like a heavy burden of debt hanging over your head that you either can’t repay, or can’t live down. Swallow your pride occasionally, it’s not fattening.

 

“I have learnt that it is better to swallow my pride, it tastes far better than desperation and hopelessness.”

 

My fear of asking for help comes from my past experiences and I tend to forget that not only have I changed and grown, but so have the people in my life. In the past, my fear was driven by the fact that some people in my life made me feel judged and made me feel like a failure. I realise now that it is my own doing, I allowed myself to feel that way. Regardless of someone else’s opinions or judgements, I can only feel how I choose to feel, and my feelings shouldn’t be guided by my wounded pride. Needing help doesn’t make you a failure. 2 and a half Years ago I was retrenched, left with no income, and a child to support as a single parent. I was given an eviction notice with 24 hours to pay my rent and I didn’t know how I was going to pay for food. Eventually, I had no choice but to ask for assistance where I could. The first response was negative, the second was positive, and the response was a simple … “why didn’t you come to me sooner?”

 

Its ok to ask for help. It doesnt mean you're a failure, only human.

Source: Google+

“Pride costs us more than hunger, thirst, and cold.” ― Thomas Jefferson

 

True friends never make you feel bad for turning to them in times of need, they feel privileged, trusted and happy to help. Sometimes our friends may not be able to help, but they are still there for you and will do all they can to make your journey an easier one. When a friend has turned to me, I have done everything I can and yet it still never felt like enough. I guess you can help circumstances but you can’t erase the pain of them. It is never easy watching those you care about most go through a tough time. Each person’s scars heal at different times, some take longer than others. The true secret to giving and receiving fully, is to do it from the heart.

 

“It is better to lose your pride with someone you love rather than to lose that someone you love with your useless pride.” ― John Ruskin

 

One of the things we need to remember when giving and receiving is to make sure that our heart is in the right place, and our intentions are pure. We should never look down on anyone who needs help, and likewise, we should never be ungrateful for help we receive. When you give, never keep a scorecard, never throw it in someone’s face or hold it against them as collateral. Friend or not, everyone needs a helping hand along the way, and more often than not, help comes from the most unlikely or unexpected place. Asking for help is a sign of strength, it is not a weakness.

 

Give without remembering, take without forgetting

Source: Google+

“Learning to live on less pride has been a great investment in my future.” ― Katerina Stoykova Klemer

 

Doing good, makes you feel good, especially when it is anonymous and you know that you have made someone smile, possibly even taken away all their worries for a brief moment. Never reject the generosity or kindness that is extended to you by others, you would be denying them the gift of blessing your life, and in turn, giving them a blessing. Be a blessing to someone random today, even if it’s surprising them with a cup of coffee. You never know how big a small gesture can be to someone who needs it.

 

“We can’t help everyone, but everyone can help someone.” – Ronald Reagan

 

We all get by with a little help from our friends … So thank you my friends, each and every one of you. For being a part of my journey and making it that much easier, and a more valuable experience.

 

 

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19 Responses to “We all get by with a little help from our friends …”

  1. Thank you for this exquisite post. It’s difficult to ask for help when we’re used to being the strong one. The one that others have always looked to for help. I needed to hear your words today.

    • Simply Me Says:

      Sheri, thank you for your positive comments and encouragment, it is truly awesome when the words we write are what a person needs to read, I am grateful that they may have been meant for you :)

  2. supriya Says:

    It as always your words do its magic. Great post indeed.
    Our so called PRIDE many time stop us to say what our heart wants to….It need help.

    Best lines from your post are:
    “Generosity is giving more than you can, and pride is taking less than you need.“― Kahlil Gibran
    True friends never make you feel bad for turning to them in times of need.
    One of the things we need to remember when giving and receiving is to make sure that our heart is in the right place.
    Thanks to you too for all untold & unmentioned helped
    God bless you :) XX

  3. One the hardest thing for me was to learn how to ask for help. I used to think asking for help meant I was admitting my weakness and that was a bad thing. Now I know that reaching out to others is a sign of strength and courage, but it also means that we show our friends how much we trust them and respect their advice and appreciate their support.
    Thank you Christine for being such a great friend :)

    • Simply Me Says:

      Carolyn you are, and always have been an example of strength for me. And it goes without saying … anytime, anyplace, anywhere … I will always be here if you need me my special friend :)

  4. ZazuMove Says:

    That must have been a hard experience you have had to go through 2,5 years ago, I feel so sad reading it and happy at the same time that you have found assistance. Ja, you are absolutely right, it lays in our hands wether we adults are able to overcome our “wounded proud” and ask for help. Hm, yet still I asked myself if “true friends” (including myself) have to `wait´ to be asked for help. When we realise that someone needs help and this person is not able to ask for assistance for whatever reason (for a true friend there is no cause to ask for that reason) we should offer help – as we are aware of our friends life (in good and bad times). In the end it is not only a question of beeing a true friend but beeing human, realising that we are different and have not always the same capacity to ask for help. Perhaps my point of view is rather naive, living in a “every man for himself” world… I know :) Thank you so much for sharing your post, you have inspired me (again and… :) ). All best wishes and blessings to you, Katharina

    • Simply Me Says:

      Not naive at all Katharina, I agree that when we see friends in need, we should be offering assistance before they even feel the need to ask.

      May God bless you and may you continue to be generous with your heart and your life, may you continue to be a blessing :) x

  5. quirkybooks Says:

    Thanks for another inspiring blog post. I have nominated you for the One Lovely Blog Award http://quirkybooks.wordpress.com/2013/03/15/quirkybooks-is-an-extra-lovely-blog-one-lovely-blog-award/

  6. Excellent post! Great advice.
    All the best.
    Shane

  7. quirkybooks Says:

    I enjoy reading your blog. I have awarded you the Liebster Award. Congratulations. http://quirkybooks.wordpress.com/2013/03/30/double-recognition-two-liebster-awards/

  8. joseasanoj Says:

    Good Post
    Sanoj Jose(Author, My Day Out With An Angel)


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