“Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn’t work if you are not on the same page.” …
If what I have to give is not enough for you, then it’s your choice if you walk away, but I’m not about to quit. That goes for all my relationships, whether you are my spouse, relative or friend. Relationships are not easy but they don’t have to be so hard either. We make our relationships complicated because of our feelings and experiences in the relationship, and we see the faults of others before we see our own. We can tend to take everything so personally and then we are on the attack. We let our pride get in the way of love, friendships, communication and we forget what we initially found. Our frustrations turn into resentment and that then builds into mistrust, and eventually we emotionally disinvest and we are ready to give up and walk away … BUT …
“The greatest gift that you can give to others is the gift of unconditional love and acceptance.” – Brian Tracy
It may sound simple or easier said than done, but if you truly love someone, you will fight for what you love, because living without that person will hurt far worse than living with them and their imperfections. It really is all about what you are prepared to sacrifice in terms of your ego, and what you are prepared to give in terms of your heart. You can’t claim to love someone, and then place a list of conditions on that love, you either love them or you don’t. Either way, you need to decide and can’t hold the other person accountable for the decisions you make in life. You can hold a person responsible for their actions, and for their own happiness, but it is not their job to bring the best out in you, or to make you happy, only you can do that. At the same time, you also can’t stay in a relationship that prevents you from being you, that denies you the freedom to express yourself and Just BE …
“If you carry bricks from your past relationship to your new one … You will build the same house.”
I am not a quitter, or at least that’s what I used to believe … but I have walked away many times in my life when I have been let down, hurt, angry, and emotionally exhausted. What I have come to learn, is that my pride means nothing, and the person I love means so much more. Perhaps it is time for each of us to look inside ourselves and find the strength to stand and fight for what we love, for the things that are most important to us, that doesn’t just in include the relationships that mean something to us … It includes YOU! Fight for YOU; never ever give up on YOU! We have become a “throw away” society; if something doesn’t work we toss it aside like it’s worthless, meaningless. We don’t even look at what attracted us or peaked our interest in the beginning, it’s broken, and we don’t want to spend the time, or make the effort to fix it. One of the best quotes I’ve ever heard is …
“You don’t have to accept every argument you’re invited to.”
LOVE THAT!!! It is so true. How you can really fight with someone who doesn’t respond or react … You can’t. Arguing with yourself is not much fun either. I believe that you should choose your battles, and if those battles are not going to change your life for the better, then why fight them. Life is not a competition, it is not about tit-for-tat or getting even, it’s about being the best you can be with all you have to give. Sometimes, it costs too much. If a relationship is costing YOU, who you are, and has changed you so that you don’t even recognise yourself anymore, then is it really a relationship of love? When you love someone, you don’t want to change them; you accept and love them unconditionally.
“The only time love can last a lifetime is if it is unconditional.”
Our biggest mistake in relationships is holding on to the mistakes others make and wanting them to feel the same pain we have felt. For every time we get insulted, we tend to insult, for each disappointment we want to disappoint in return, for every lie we keep our own secrets, effectively … are we not getting what we give already? If you want respect, you have to give it even if you have not received it. If you want love, you have to love the ones that are hardest to love to get the greatest love in return. If you want more from others, their loyalty, their trust, their time, you have to give all of this unconditionally, freely, and without expectation.
“Love never fails, only people do when they give up because they are not able to find the love they are holding within them.”
I never said it was going to be easy, but I can assure you that it’s worth it. In all aspects on any relationship, to give because you can, to love because you feel it, to embrace the relationships because you have already embraced who you are. For the first time in a long time, I don’t want to argue, I prefer to reason, I don’t want to be angry, and I prefer to be peaceful. I totally love my life, and the amazing, incredible people I am so blessed to have share my journey with me. I hope that they view me the same, we met for a reason, they are either a blessing or a lesson, and I can only hope to be a blessing to them. If I am going to get what I give, then best I make sure that I am giving all I have to give to the ones I love.
“The one thing we can never get enough of is love. And the one thing we never give enough is love.”
– Henry Miller
“Today, is a blessing … Today, be a blessing” …
- Unconditional Love (jbournesblog.wordpress.com)
- The 10 Commandments of Relationships (sitdownatatypewriterandbleed.wordpress.com)
- “Love Is A Many-Splendored Thing”* (spinningrabbi.com)